speaking

I participated in slam poetry for three years. In 2004, I was titled the Orlando Grand Slam Master and was sent to the Individual World Poetry Slam where the top 40 slam poets in the nation compete.

The following is the audio for the published piece "Dan Turned 21 and Threw-up on Himself" (lyrics below) (.mp3, 1.8M).

Rapplication for Carnegie Mellon

"RApplication Recitation of Intention for Carnegie Mellon"(mixed and mastered by Michael Occhipinti)
This is my application essay for Carnegie Mellon's Entertainment Technology Master's program.


You'll be inclined to find that ride design was my passion from the get-go
When at eight, I built a 3-D model EPCOT out of LEGOs.
Then got bolstered up on coasters; felt fond to foster this obsession
With discretion and art-repression, I aimed at the engineer profession.
I became a manic of mechanics. I'd be a ride-designing great,
But due to the gravity of the field, the mass entertainment had to wait.
Before I wraparound a cap and gown and make undergraduate history,
I'd unmask the fastest way to ride the amusement park ride industry.
I found my B.S. in M.E will be less-than-semi in a competitive field as such
and to go after an M.E. Master won't help my storytelling much.
I thought there was no luck in finding a program combining the things I do excel in,
But a low and behold, I was going to fold, a twofold Masters at Carnegie Mellon.

"Barry," I said, "It's seldom a chance to meld up science and arts.
(Pardon le French) And not to mention, get l'enfur out of these parts!"
Now using a string of similes I'll hogtie my creativity by the toes;
I call it the "Like Bob or John trait lexicon." Now this is how it goes…
Like Bob Hoskins, you can say that I was stuck in animation.
Like Bob Villa, I make houses, but they're sets for my claymation.
Like Bob Flay, I'm into cooking as I love plate presentation.
Like Bob Ross, I have the fro and I find painting brings elation.
Like John Wayne, I love to draw, but I'm not that big on guns.
Like John Lennon, I'm a writer, but I overuse the pun.
Like John Woo, I write some movies, but without a straight Face/On.
Like John Connor, I love robots, but not the Terminating one.
(And I think it's weird that Sean Connery was named John Connor in Rising Sun)
Now, you can gander my wondrous artwork under wonderbarry.com.

But before admission, I'm sure you're wishing to hear a listing of qualifications
And to order my kingdom of thoughts, I formed familiar classifications:
First entertainment, then engineering, and then an adhering of the two.
For occasions engaging an audience, I think I've had a few.
First and foremost, I wrote two books, one of which I have enclosed.
It's a novel children's novel like Dahl's and Carroll's I suppose.
I also write some poetry, but I hope that's obvious by now.
And after competing reading poems, I think my name has got around.
I became the city's highest ranked poet after months of these recitals
And bestowed, I hold "Orlando Grand Slam Master" as my title.
I also front-man a band and we are doing well as of yet.
You can find more information on that at OffWhiteNoise.net.
As far as art and animation, I enclosed a CD of assortment
Where you'll find such things my 1:24 scaled down model of my apartment.

Now as far as engineering achievements, the listing is quite large, hence,
I'll highlight in neon yellow and you can note-take in the margins.
I am active in both ASME and Pi Tau Sigma, and it's evident.
In fact, I'm so active in the latter that I am actually the President.
I also have experience in 3-D modeling with IDEAs
And AutoCAD. I'm glad I'm rapid prototyping this year.
Now I probably shouldn't be bragging, but I guess it's worth knowing,
That my 4.0 cumulative is how it's been going.
As for entertainment technology, so far what I've done--
These are two ways I found to make mechanical engineering fun.
I have a half-way finished thesis on pneumatic capsule pipelines
Combined with linear induction motors to form mechanically agile thrill rides
And for my senior design project, GamesWorkshop is our sponsor
We're engineering a five foot animatronic rat-like monster.

And yes, I have several downfalls. These are the few that I recall:
As much as I see my pluses, I know no programming at all.
And Like Kevin, I'm so Spacey; Buzz Lite (year-1982)
Would be my beer, but that's another story and Toy Story too.
But seriously, I seriously want to animate in Maya.
I know very little Pro E, and even less of Wildfire.
I would hope to pull from an ET degree more storytelling skills
And how to comether with others with other talents in the fields
And how to apply my technical abilities to entertain an audience.
I'd eventually want to build on building amusement motion rides.

I attached this rapschtick rapsody rapplication all rapidly said
On CD because the intonation and emphases can't be read.
I know I'm not like "Eminem," I'd say I'm more like Reese's Pieces; See
The way I traced a path, it seemed to point me straight at E.T..
I know my style's fuzzy, but the signal's fine don't get up.
Let me help out the reception and conclude with a channel set up.
A Lifetime of Learning Entertainment was forecast by my History and Uni-vision
And Like Oxygen, I BET that it'll be a GAS, call it ESP'N intuition.
Weather I have to DIY Discovery or Travel, I'll pull Strait on like Magellan,
But I don't want to stay Home and Garden; rather go "U-pick" Carnegie Mellon.
Now I'm hoping for the M.E.T., but getting a museum's not my plan.
Out of all the applicants, I want to be an applican.

© Barry Matthew Kudrowitz, all rights reserved, 2017